I have been going to aerial dance lessons for a month now. this is something I had been wanting to do for years. the main reasons I didn’t go before were:

  • no money… which is the reason I don’t do like 89% of things in life
  • no previous experience, which is the reason I also wanted to go in the first place, to try something completely foreign and new
  • no decent sports clothes because I don’t do any physical activity so why would I have those?
  • fear of being completely ridiculous
  • fear of dying by falling from the silks because I’m so unskilled and I shouldn’t have gone in the first place so serves me right for having hopes and desires

that was until a month ago when I reluctantly sent a private message to a school very close to my home. I sent this message as if I was sending a risky text to a crush or something.

first of all, whoever answered me back was super nice. I was expecting a rude service so that I had a reason not to go. everything would’ve been easier that way.

then, the person told me that the first class was free. ash. so even if I wasn’t going to keep going, at least I could try it for one lesson. I had nothing to lose.

then I thought that maybe the classes wouldn’t fit my inexistent super busy schedule. or maybe they would be too early in the morning. maybe during my lunch time. so many things could’ve gone wrong with the schedules. but no. they were at 9 am.

the first day came by. I went out of my house. I walked some streets. I opened the door. and there I was, in my first aerial dance lesson, wearing a t-shirt and some old running pants.

as with any first time in anything for me, it’s very awkward to say hi to everybody or to introduce myself. in many of those circumstances, I just find a place to sit and stay quiet, expecting somebody to greet me or something.

the teacher introduced me. she knew my name and she even pronounced it correctly. ugh. and then, everybody smiled at me. they smiled. ughx2.

and the class started.

confession: I almost died during the warm-up. and you know what? the teacher kept motivating me the whole time! pfff. and she told me how good I was doing it… AND I KEPT DOING IT!

after the warm-up, it was time to choose a silk. I chose the nearest one, not thinking if anybody else had claimed it or something. I just stood next to it.

before going, I already knew that I would need a lot of strength to do anything. I was anticipating that I would not be able to do anything because I’ve been a couch potato for at least 15 years in my life.

so the first thing I was surprised about is that I could do some things. I could almost carry my own weight!

although it was super hard and I could barely do anything… I ENJOYED TRYING IT! and it felt SO GOOD when I could do anything.

WHYYYYY?! WERE THESE THE ENDORPHINS WERKING?!?!!?

and then, as if only 5 minutes had passed by, the class came to an end.

I was like, what? this already finished? that fast? and, most importantly, I SURVIVED?

we made some final stretches. everybody said a super happy goodbye. the teacher smiled at me knowing that I could keep going.

she got me, goddamit!

I’ve been sore for one month now. whenever I think I have mastered a little thing, something new comes and I have to start from zero again.

the fear of embarrassing myself is gone. nobody judges me. everybody cheers whenever I accomplish something. ugh.

I will keep going and be all disciplined about it. ugh.

that would be the worst.

this is me being a show-off

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